Le Sigh

Alright, let's just get it over with already. Three months, just three: half of a deployment, a quarter of year. No big. Let's just do it. 

Really, it sucks. The kids get all wonky and who wants to be without their right hand man? But, c'est la vie. I'll suck it up, for now, since I at least get to talk to him at night. 

In other news, Deacon finally had his nine month check up with the much hated Tri Care clinic. I was able to hold my tongue long enough for them to weigh and measure him. At 18 pounds, he's the smallest Baggett, ever. Apparently, he is in the 9th percentile for weight. He is much thinner than the other two beasts (90 percentile for height and weight during the baby year) but still a healthy boy. 

Don't let him fool you! He army crawls like a maniac but could care less about
being on all fours!

 Having John around all week was so nice. I was treated to shopping sprees (oh yeah! plural, baby!)  and treats. 

Turner and John ran in to the Twisted Sister Cupcake van on base today! 

Sweet chaos. 

 John promised the boys a campout but it's been a little cool outside. So, for our little people that hang on every promise... 

They watched Wall-E and "camped" with Daddy.

Let's hope the next few months fly by. I hate wishing time away, but solo parenting is no bueno. 

Rationing Out Nana

My Nana was this ol' Southern Belle. She was sharp as a tack, sweet as pecan pie, and ever the "prawpah" (southern for 'proper') lady. She always carried handkerchiefs around, even when it was a hundred degrees out. When she passed away some years ago, I was allowed to go through her things and settled on some hankies and costume jewelery. I loved my Nana but wasn't sure how to display the hankies that was fitting of my style (if I have that) and I was always afraid they'd be destroyed in one of our many moves. For all these years they've been sitting in my underwear drawer; just squished in the back, never seeing the light of day.

A handful of hankies.

Enter the wide world of blogging. 

I ran across this tutorial for a necklace and I knew immediately that Nana would be a-ok if I hacked up her hankies! I just needed to be "allowed" to do it and this was a way for me not to feel bad about cutting up antique heirlooms.

First up was a bib necklace for my sister's birthday. I used Little Miss Momma's tutorial and added a few differences. I went for a straight across bib and also added two other types of materials for a more full effect. 

I cut circles out of a hankie I thought my sister would like. 

I left the chain long so the recipient could shorten it.

For interest, I added some black chiffon from an old target skirt and the pink
is actually pink (fake) flower pedals. 

Next was something for my cousin Samantha. She's always rockin' the headband and, after seeing all the cute rosettes and pom poms around the bloggy world, I went with this...

cut in to 1" strips

ends sewn together

Sam liked this arrangement! I was able to make two headbands (6 rosettes)
from one hankie.

I love how neutral this one is! 

I'm really happy with how the handkerchiefs are being used. They've sat for all these years but finally have a new life! 

A Week Off!!

We are enjoying a nice surprise week off! John mis-read his orders and isn't attached to anyone this week between his classes so we're going to have a week of fun. 

First off: a Mommy morning out shopping (dire need of some updated clothes now that I don't have to whip out the ladies ever two hours to nurse). No kids, no worries. Just me and a huge mall! 

Then, we headed to the zoo for some fun. 

Turner insisted on a long sleeve shirt and these way too short pants! 

Success! Eli is out of pajamas! 

"Chewbaka" aka Pepper the Orangutan.  The kids think she looks like Chewy from Star Wars. 

Silly orangutans! 

One of my new dresses. It makes me look so small. I think I'll keep it forever!

Such a fantastic Daddy!! 

Poor Dunks, he's been cutting a tooth for a few days and has been pulling on his ear. 

Swinging made him smile...

...until he decided he had some beef with the swing hardware. 

Rare form: not smiling! 

 After a nice short afternoon at the zoo we decided to hit up a local institution, Doumar's. Luckily, we had a DVD in the car so the kids had the extra special treat of scarfing down a hamburger, fries and a shake while watching the Jungle Book!  

Can't get much more American that that! 

How to Wait for Daddy

When you're 4 and 2, the only thing cooler than finding a sweet stick in the shape of a "shooter gun" is waiting for Daddy to come home!

Here's how to do it:

1. Tell Mommy you won't eat until Daddy gets home.

2. Get in a major fight with your brother that results in separating yourself from said brother.

3. Go to the front porch and wait.

4. And wait...

5. Start licking and blowing raspberries on the glass door.

6. Refrain from running in to the driveway to greet Daddy!

A Little TMI

But it's my blog, right?

I've spent the last two weeks just overly tired (I'm usually a pretty energetic person), short tempered and back achy. Sound like familiar symptoms?!?

Yaaaaay. <---- Insert super duper sarcastic voice riiiight there.

Aunt Flow, ridin' the tide, trolling for vampires, saddlin' ol' rusty, you know, not feelin' my best 'cause my VUH JAY JAY IS BLEEDING.

Not good. Especially the first one in...FOREVER! I had just two periods after Eli was born and before I got pregnant with Deacon. So, let's just guestimate since September of 2007 I've only had two!

So, it felt like a got hit by a Mac truck after being sleep deprived and punched in the gut.

It seems the fog has FINALLY lifted and my days are much brighter.  In addition to finally feeling better Deacon has graced me with MANY nights of sleep and I have a husband again!

Hallelujah!

Eli's Turn

Poor dude. 

He did not have a good day. He was ornery and kept crying at random. 

I found him like this when he was supposed to be napping.

We went to the Y so I could go for a swim and the boys could play. After that we went to the park, came home for naps, Turner practiced some sight words for school and then went back to the park. 

Eli was just off all day. I cuddled him and just tried to tread lightly. He fell at the park and I actually thought he might have injured himself because he kept crying and whining about it (usually, a kiss will make it all better). We got home and he was still crying, bath time was teary eyed, getting in to jams was filled with tears...

Finally, I said "Buddy, show Mommy where it hurts. Is it your chest (from the fall)?"

 His lip curled up and he goes "I want Daddy. I miss him."

(Insert Mommy sucking it up right here)

Poor dude. He was out of it. 

Turner totally stepped up and put his arm around him and goes "It's ok, Eli, I'm the dad now." This all stems from a conversation with John in which John tried to explain to Turner that he was the "man of the house." 

Heh. Men.

A Pattern Emerges

Alright, folks, I'm going to be a little honest here. 

Our adjustment after John came home/I had a baby was arduous. The first months were incredibly rocky for our family. John and I never really got that reconnection that should have been top priority after deployment. The kids were socked with a double whammy of Daddy (whom Eli thought just dropped off the face of the Earth) and a new brother. 

Thankfully, Eli was too young to understand much. All he knew was that he was happy, healthy and enjoying time with his family. Turner, on the other hand, was stressed from the events. It was a terrible, albeit growing, time for all of us. I was completely confused about Turner's behavior and, in turn, grew very tired and agitated. The little boy didn't throw a tantrum until 2.5 years old was acting completely out of character. 

After months of wondering if his anger (calling base psychologist and discussing taking Turner to a "talking" doctor) and emotional outbursts were normal, we reached some sort of equilibrium again. 

Finally. 

And then John left in January and I was standing, alone, with an angry child. Clearly upset but not able to talk about anything. Again, I asked just a few close friends their thoughts. I received nothing but support but I could see something was wrong. Not just the anger, but the inability to handle simple situations (just ask me about the library), insecurity, fear of me leaving... So, again, I called around for a "talking" doctor. Someone has to know how to speak to my child to get him to open up. I tried to make connections with him and for him. "So and so's daddy leaves, too" or "So and so gets sad, too." I have and am still trying (but not overly aggressive) to ask the right questions and give him the chance to speak. 

I found a great resource in Ah Ha! Parenting and have been using the articles and newsletters to remind myself daily of the task at hand. Positively raising this child that harbors such anger at times. He's young, and that lil' frontal lobe won't develop for years: I understand that on a geekery level. Anger in a child with such a good family life is hard for the parent to understand. We're far from perfect, but we've got a pretty great life! 

John returned from that underway and, after a few days' worth of adjustment, Turner was back to a more normal self.

John's gone again and we had a great few days. Then, today, he woke up pissed at the world. Why? I have no idea. I spend the entire day being calm and non-reactive, loving and attentive. I got yelled at hit and just disrespected. The kids fought like brothers do when it's one of "those" days and the baby was a bit off. Not taking that personally is a daily struggle. 

Today it was hard.

I've finally seen the pattern. It was difficult, at first, because we only experienced this a few times. The pattern was too short. I see it now, so I feel a bit better that my baby does come back. He just needs to feel his daddy's absence and this is how he does it. 

It's not fun. It's exhausting, time consuming and frustrating. But he didn't choose this life for him, we did. I'll be damned if I don't do anything and everything I can for him.